PEOPLE - 106 " SENIORS COLBY AND CHERYL BLAISDEll cut their wedding cake at the reception following their Nov. 27 wedding in Plano, Texas. "Harding's enVllonment is very conducive to marriage because irs such anaccepted thing. You become ready fo rmarriage here;'Cheryl said. ,COURTESY OFM.JAMES MYTH ORTRUTH? STUDENT SWINGS INTO/MARRIAGE FACTORY/REPUTATION People say that Harding is a H maniage factory," and often in a rather pejorative sense, as in,. "Harding is 5uch a marriage factory! Well, I'm never letting it get me!" Girls say this as if handsome ence in the ring business comes from walking briskly past mall jewelry stores on the way to Bookland. Also, I have no concept of what's attractive. So 1have to pretend. "That is a stunningly beautiful ring!" young men were leaping o"u~t..,.. ___ -'-' of the bushes every day - They never seem impressed by my reaction. "But don't you like it?" they'll ask "Eh, why notr' I say, and by about that point they get the message. thrusting diamond rings in their faces, and people like me usually just nod and smile, when we are actually thinking. NOh, please let it get me! Oh please!" The rest of us are left still wondering if the idea of a "marriage factory" is really just a sick joke. But bitterness does not become us. So I try to act happy when girls show me their engagement rings. To be honest, though, I really don't care about the ring. I may be happy that they are getting married, sure, but, being a single guy, my only experil! doesn't really matter. The girl does not care in the least what you think of the ring. What she really cares about are the opinions of all of her girlfriends, many of whom are already engaged, or engaged to be engaged, or engaged to be engaged to be engaged, and the competition is getting fearsome. For us actual purchasers of the stone, this can be a little daunting. We all understand that the ring has to be absolutely perfect within a reasonable college studen(s price range ($64.34 and a Pizza Pro coupon), and the pressure can sometimes be fairly high. Then comes the wedding itself, which always starts out in the groom's mind as a small, intimate affair held in some suitable location such as Waikiki. When the bride-to-be hears this, she announces, "That idea sounds fantastic! I've never wanted a big wedding. anyway." This, of course, is a preposterous lie, and occasionally the groom is dumb enough to buy it. The bride has actually been planning her wedding down to the last flower petal since age 3, and she is not going to let something as insignificant as the wishes of the groom impede her glorious and life-<:onsuming march to matrimony. So, now that I've shared my feelings on engagement, I'm still eligible. Any takers? -CHRIS GUIN Ed itor'S rlOte: Chris Guin was ahumorcolumni'it forthe PeritJean
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